Hail Mary

When my parents separated about twenty years ago, my mother converted to Catholicism. Most of her sisters had when they married after the war. Her first boyfriend would not marry her because she was protestant. Mom has always been a believer. I remember her taking us to church before our first long trip to Ontario and I remember her telling me about the second coming. It was she who instilled and encouraged us to say grace, to go to church and to be a follower of Jesus Christ. There were periods in her life when she did not practise any religion because of some very complicated reasons though she always believed. After her conversion to Catholicism she made some dramatic changes in her life. She stopped drinking and smoking. She devoted (and still does) a portion of her day to read her Bible and say prayers. These days she spends almost every waking hour in front of of the Catholic Channel.

Because we all married and had moved away, we were not familiar with our mother's chosen path. This little holiday has brought it front and centre. Tonight during one program where a nun was reciting the rosary, our mother became so animated and alert. She had not brought her rosary so she used her fingers. She recited them word for word with such devotion. This ritual brings her such comfort and peace. My mother wants to go to heaven. She wants God to accept her into his rest. She hopes she has been forgiven and has lived a life worthy of his glory. She talks about this often. For a long time, I used to wonder why her faith filled her with such anxiety and worry but these days I know this is not the case. In her own way, she is preparing to see her maker.

She might not remember what she said ten minutes ago. She doesn't remember our names nor things that we have seen and done together. She does remember that she is a believer.

Onward Christian soldier.